Via Digg, via AOL:

English actor Firth – who had to re-shoot the scene – is quoted by Britain's The Sun newspaper as saying: "Helen's character plays my children's school teacher and one of the most emotional parts of the film is when she comes to sleep on the floor of the room where I am with the kids. It's very, very quiet and we can’t speak too loudly.

"There was a camera at floor level – then somebody down there broke wind incredibly loudly. It was not silent - it was deadly! Then there was this silence, this paralysis in the room. Helen, who was in my arms, asked, 'What just happened?' Some very noble soul put his hand up and admitted that they did it."

As reported via Stereogum, Prince covered Radiohead's Creep at Coachella yesterday. Here it is:

Let me set the scene for you: Two women are in a clothing store. The pretty blonde one with a face of 45 but the hair, mouth, teeth, and eyes of a 22 year-old, tries on a pink Abominable Snowman shaw with what appears to be a pink and green christmas wreath on the front. She turns to the ugly one and asks, "What do you think?"

They both start laughing and the narrator cuts into the commercial.

"Little bladder leaks happen to the best of us," said the narrator.

Now, I know that the spigot on the side of the house used to leak when the hose wasn't hooked up to it but... say what?

If I was in charge of the Flyers, here's what my lineup would look like over the next two seasons.

08/09
Gagne - Briere - Lupul
Hartnell - Richards - Umberger
Upshall - Carter - Downie/Thoresen
Greentree- Roenick - Kapanen

Timonen - Coburn
Liles - Hatcher/Staal
Kukkonen - Parent

Biron
Rask

Significant off-season moves:

• Re-sign Jeff Carter ($4.5, 5 yr), R.J. Umberger ($2, 3 yr) and Patrick Thoresen ($.7, 2 yr)
• Sign Jeremy Roenick ($0.5, 1 yr)
• Trade Dennis Tolpeko, the negotiating rights for Randy Jones, and a pick for negotiating rights to John-Michael Liles ($3, 2 yr)
• Trade Antero Niittymaki, Mike Knuble, and Stefan Ruzicka to Boston for Tuukka Rask
• Trade Downie and maybe a pick to the Rangers for Marc Staal before the trade deadline
• Rathje finally retires
• Alternate option: The Penguins have a ton of UFAs this off season. The Flyers might have some interest in Ryan Malone

09/10
Gagne - Briere - Lupul
vanRiemsdyk - Richards - Giroux
Upshall - Carter - Thoresen
Greentree - Potulny - Nodl

Liles - Coburn
Timonen - Parent
Kukkonen - Staal

Rask
Biron

Significant off-season moves:

• Re-sign Joffrey Lupul ($4, 3yr), Martin Biron ($2.2, 2yr), Greentree ($1, 2yr) and Lasse Kukkonen ($1.2, 3yr)
• Sami Kapanen, Jeremy Roenick and Derian Hatcher retire
• Alternate option: With the loss of Kapanen, Roenick, and Hatcher, that entire wave of vets will be gone. It might be worth approaching a fully seasoned vet to provide a little extra leadership in the locker room for a year

Admittedly, I didn't do the math for the 09/10 season but I don't know what the cap will be. I assume it'll be around $60, though.

Now that the first round of the playoffs is over, let's check in on my predictions and see how they panned out.

1. Anaheim
WHAT I SAID: "This team is just sick and with the late-season additions of Niedermayer and Selanne, they've got a lot of extra boost for the playoffs."

WHAT HAPPENED: Dallas crushed them in six games. So much for that.

2. Montreal
WHAT I SAID: "If Carey Price can hold up, this team will remain hot through the post-season and give any Eastern Conference team a difficult challenge."

WHAT HAPPENED: Their goaltending did pull through, though Price was shaky at the end. Boston took them to the brink before finally being eliminated by Montreal in game 7.

NEW PREDICTION: The Habs will beat the Flyers in 5 games. The only way Philadelphia stands a chance is if Price is still shaky, and the likes of Kovalev and Koivu are hindered by injuries.

3. Detroit
WHAT I SAID: "[The key to their success is] goaltending. Osgood had an unbelievably good start to his season. Then, he signed a new contract and forgot how to stop a puck from going into the net much like Beavis and Butt-head forgot how to pee."

WHAT HAPPENED: Nashville gave them a little scare and Hasek sat the bench for the last few games. Osgood showed up and played incredibly well for this offensive and defensive powerhouse.

NEW PREDICTION: The Avalanche should be no match for the Red Wings. Theodore could not possibly hold up in net against them. The only way the Avs stand a chance is if their offense can pile up the shots on net, a task that is easier said than done against this team. If they don't, I predict a Detroit sweep.

4. Calgary
WHAT I SAID: "Everyone forgets about the Flames because they're just not a sexy team at all. There's no allure. It's time for them to step up and make the rest of the league recognize."

WHAT HAPPENED: The Flames did make everyone take notice of them by forcing a game seven in San Jose but they were overpowered by Jeremy Roenick's four point display and sent packing for the golf course.

5. New Jersey
WHAT I SAID: "Aside from Brodeur this team has, umm, nobody and nobody. Ovechkin will probably score more goals than their leading point-getter will tally for goals and assists."

WHAT HAPPENED: The Rangers crushed the Devils in five games and Brodeur was weak at points. In five games, the Devils scored 12 goals. Elias lead the team with six points. However, Ovechkin only had four goals but he finished the series with nine overall points, a number lower than expected on account of the brilliant defensive work of Kimmo Timonen.

6. Dallas
WHAT I SAID: "Mike Ribeiro [is the key to their success]. He's been phenomenal this year and, as long as he doesn't collapse in the post-season, this team will have a good shot at the Cup."

WHAT HAPPENED: Ribeiro lead both the Stars and the Ducks with eight points, only two of which were goals but the real star turned out to be Marty Turco, who played brilliantly throughout this series, posting a 2.01 GAA and a .912 PCT.

NEW PREDICTION: Vezina candidate, Evgeni Nabokov may be the best backstop left in the West. As obvious as it sounds, the Stars ability to put pucks behind him will determine whether or not they win. If Richards, Modano, Ribeiro, et al. can post some pretty good numbers, Dallas will advance. If my math is correct, Dallas is 4-2-2 against the Sharks this year.

7. Pittsburgh
WHAT I SAID: "What's to prevent them from winning a Cup? I don't think they're ready yet. Mentally, I don't think they'll be able to pull it together and I think any team that plays Pittsburgh will crush Crosby."

WHAT HAPPENED: Some people will say that Pittsburgh threw the final game of the regular season in order to face the deflated Ottawa in the first round, instead of Philadelphia. Ottawa had long since fallen apart and this series was a cakewalk for the Pens.

NEW PREDICTION: The Rangers will be the Pens first real opponent in the playoffs. Expect Avery to get in Fleury's face and lots of physical play against Crosby, Malkin, and Hossa. Getting by the Rangers will be a bigger challenge than Pittsburgh anticipates. New York is getting balanced scoring, good veteran leadership, and stellar goaltending. This may be the most evenly matched series in the second round of the playoffs. If the series goes seven, expect the Rangers to come out with their heads up high or the Penguins to be limping off the ice.

8. Minnesota
WHAT I SAID: "The likes of Boogard and Belanger have to come back healthy soon and kick some ass and take some names."

WHAT HAPPENED: It was a fun series but, in the end, the Avalanche dominated the injury-depleted Wild.

9. Ottawa
WHAT I SAID: "Their first line [is the key to their success]. They need to out-produce any and all opponents."

WHAT HAPPENED: The Senators were plagued with injuries and they had no idea what hit them. Pittsburgh crushed them in four.

10. Washington
WHAT I SAID: "This team is 10th in the East and has to catapult over two teams just to make it into the playoffs. Don't count them out just yet, though. Ovechkin is impossibly good, Semin is finally healthy, and Backstrom is firing on all cylinders. Huet was a key pickup at the deadline to provide the Caps with some much needed solid netminding."

WHAT HAPPENED: Not only did the Capitals make it into the playoffs, but they won their division and finished in third. They took Philadelphia the distance. It was clear that the Caps were hungrier in this series but the Flyers barely snuck by in OT of Game 7. However, had the Flyers not gotten sloppy in the third period of game one, they would've swept the Caps.

CORRECT: 4 teams (Montreal, Detroit, Dallas, Pittsburgh)
EAST: Montreal vs. NY Rangers
WEST: Detroit vs. Dallas
CUP: Montreal beats Detroit in six

People are so biased against Philadelphia that they suggest the Flyers are even hurting their own players. Here's a quote from the Edmonton Journal:

Timonen, who's been on the ice almost every time Ovechkin climbed over the boards, crashed into the Caps' net late in the second period when he was rudely shoved from behind by Flyers forward Brooks Laich as the blue-liner went to the net. He appeared to injure his right shoulder or arm.

Nice try, Jim Matheson, but Laich is a Capital.

It amazes me how little sports journalists seem to know about hockey. Worst of all is the bandwagon Capitals fans who couldn't give two shits about hockey until the playoffs started. It's kind of ridiculous but, hey, I guess it's good for the game, right? I don't know. I just don't know anymore.

While nobody thinks the Flyers are going to win this playoff series versus the Capitals, it's generally agreed upon that the Flyers do stand a chance. But what do they need to do to win?

I won't bother going over a matchup. Every hockey site in the world has done the general run down. I'll just give you the general synopsis.

The Flyers have a better third and fourth offensive lines than the Caps. Biron and Huet have both been solid down the stretch in net but Huet is the better goalie. The biggest weakness in the matchup is the Flyers defense. Aside from Timonen and Coburn, the Flyers' d-men are either slow or flawed. Some are both.

In order to beat the Caps, they need to patch that up. Three easy moves will solve that problem.

1. Call up Denis Gauthier. Since it's the playoffs, he won't go through waivers and there is money under the cap now to afford the move. He's faster than Smith and Hatcher and can check like just about nobody else in the league. He'll put the fear of God into the young Capitals players and have an impact on Ovechkin.

2. Put Kapanen back on the blue line. I love Kaps but he's a non-factor on offense this year. He only has 8 points all season. His speed and finesse will solve some major problems we have on defense. There are plenty of other players that can fill his spot easily.

3. Rotate 7 men on defense and roll three lines up front. Hatcher and Smith are ailing. Jones, Modry, and Kukkonen can be liabilities. Gauthier can fill in nicely for Hatcher, Smith, or Modry. Kapenen can fill in easily for Jones, Modry, or Kukkonen. So, scratch either Hatcher or Smith and either Jones, or Kukkonen. Play the rest of them in spurts and in specific situations. It'll give the Flyers more depth than anyone is anticipating they'd have in their own zone.

If there's an injury or a problem, Kapanen can always be moved back to offense. In the meantime, he's better suited on D.

Via Digg via Wired via Maxim:

What was the freakiest thing you ever snorted blow off of when you were a prominent coke fiend?
I came home one day, took off my windbreaker, and three bindles of cocaine fell to the floor. Well, my dog, Chili, who has short hair, came in and laid on her back with her legs in the air, and she rubbed all my cocaine on her back and side. I yelled, "No, Chili! No" So I got a straw, and I started brushing her hair and snorting where I saw cocaine. Back, butt, side -- not a spot was left. It took me 25 minutes to snort all the cocaine the dog had on her coat. The fringe benefits of this were that the fleas, the dog hair, the mud, and the sweat went in my nose, too. It's not a good flavor coming off the dog.

For the record, I'm not writing all these blogs at once. Since my old host began sucking ass, I have been unable to post any new blogs since before Easter.

I really like the Phoenix Coyotes. They've got a really good, young team that I think is going to surprise a lot of people in upcoming years. For the hockey households out there, expect names like Peter Mueller, Kyle Turris, Enver Lisin, Martin Hanzal, Keith Ballard, and Keith Yandle to become much more common in a few years.

In addition, Dan Carcillo is quickly developing into one of the sickest fighters in the league, and Ilja Bryzgalov is an underrated goalie and Al Montoya will quickly develop into a solid goalie in a 1a and 1b starter situation. I also very much like the combination of Wayne Gretzky and Rick Tocchet behind the bench. The Great One brings all the hockey intelligence you could ask for and Tocchet brings the fire to be lit under the players' asses. They compliment each other very well.

The Coyotes are a fun team to watch and I enjoy their style of play. It's a bit more informal and much less routine than the Flyers. It's refreshing to watch and I hope Philly can take a cue from this desert team.

This season isn't over yet but I'm already going to guarantee that the Coyotes make the playoffs next year.

In related news, I had a very happy moment this morning as I contemplated how the Pens clinched the Atlantic and the Flyers will probably miss the playoffs again. I realized that the Penguins are totally screwed. They will have 20 free agents at the end of this year, including two of their goalies: Conklin and Fleury. New acquisition, Hossa, will also be a UFA, so will Ryan Malone. Toss in the fact that Crosby's hefty raise kicks in next year, and the team has very little money to re-sign anyone. Hossa will almost definitely be gone. My guess is that you'll see Malkin get traded. He'll be a RFA the next year. I just can't see how they'll afford him. All of their money will be spent tying up players in this offseason. If he's not traded, they might just see if he gets signed to an offer sheet elsewhere, but that can be risky.

The Phlly fan in me wants to see Malkin in orange and black. The hockey fan in me wants to see him in Washington, playing with Ovechkin. Either way, I think I'll be happy because that would mean he's not in Pittsburgh.

From MLBTradeRumors.com:

There are signs that Ryan Howard wants an unprecedented contract - he won't be using Miguel Cabrera as his model. A trade before he reaches free agency (after the 2010 season) seems likely.

I couldn't be happier. I know most people in Philly would disagree with me but I say good riddance. Sure he hits an insane amount of home runs but he also strikes out more than any one else and he makes a ton of errors. In addition to watching him set a record for strikeouts in a season, it's gut-wrenching to try and watch him catch a ball. He simply doesn't know how to do it. How does anyone get to a major league level of any sport without the ability to do the most fundamental aspect of the game?

The Phillies have a ton of power at the plate. Howard really helps there. Our biggest weakness is clearly our pitching, though. After Hamels and maybe Myers, the Phils are totally screwed. Kendrick may prove us wrong but, as it stands now, he's unproven. Plus, Hamels called his current contract situation a "slap in the face." So, he may be gone as soon as he's eligible to test the free agent market too. Carlos Carrasco should be in the top part of the rotation before then.

Maybe we can add some depth to our rotation by trading away Howard. I'd love to see any combination of the following types of players: an ace, a good #2 starter, a solid lefty reliever, a top-tier third basemen, Pat Burrell's replacement in left field.

Let's say we get rid of Howard but keep Hamels. By then, our rotation may be: Hamels/#1 Starter, #2 Starter/Hamels, Carrasco, Myers, Kendrick. That's a pretty impressive lineup of starters. If the Phils can add a right handed power hitter to replace Burrell in left, then we'll still have a ton of power and a great rotation. At that point, I think the Phils will easily be World Series favorites.

So, by all means, trade Howard. Get rid of him at the end of this year if you can. He belongs in the AL, anyway. Fortunately, that's where all the good pitchers are too.